What to Expect After a Caesarean.
What to expect emotionally after a caesarean
The emotions that you may experience after a caesarean
will depend very much on whether you chose to birth in this way,
or whether you were aiming for a natural, uncomplicated vaginal
birth. They will also depend on what actually occurred during the
caesarean birth of your child.
If you prepared yourself for a caesarean birth, and
everything went well on the day, then you may have no emotional
issues connected to the caesarean at all. You may flow straight
back into everyday life with very little difficulty, apart from
the normal physical healing needed.
If you planned a caesarean birth, but something 'happened'
on the day that wasn't expected (i.e., your child needed paediatric
help, your anaesthesia didn't work as well as expected, etc) then
you may need to deal with the emotional trauma that is connected
to these experiences.
You may have been planning a natural birth and events
did not go as planned, in late pregnancy or on the day, so an emergency
caesarean became necessary.
'There was a moment of silence. The Doctor then
told me that I was to have a caesarean section. Things moved pretty
fast after that... I was in no position to make any decisions. I
just felt numb with exhaustion and relieved that the end was near.'
The degree of emotional trauma associated with each
of these situations would relate back to how much of an emergency
the caesarean actually was, how much control the Mother retained
over the birth experience and the progress and outcome of the surgery.
That is, the caesarean could have occurred because:
Each of these situations will impact on our emotions and how we
deal with the caesarean we experienced.
'Midwives started taping my rings and removing
my jewellery, the doctor gave me 'a little something to stop the
nausea' into my drip-line, the anaesthetist arrived, the doctor
was talking at me about the pro's and con's of surgery and then
he gave me a form to sign. Then the anaesthetist explained the pro's
and con's of the epidural before they got that set up - all this
during powerful contractions when I wasn't really with it. Most
of the time they were talking to me I had my eyes shut, and it was
impossible to open them and concentrate on what they were saying.'
It is extremely distressing to be rushed to theatre from labour
ward, not knowing if your baby will survive. The sterility needed,
and the need for emergency action, may be bewildering and confusing.
The loss of your support people, as they either gown up, or are
denied admittance to the theatre if you are having a general anaesthetic,
would be devastating. It is normal for your body to suffer some
emotional trauma after such an experience. Thankfully, not many
caesareans occur in such a setting.
How you react emotionally to the surgery, whether you understand
the need for technology to intervene, and accept the fact that your
child is to be born in this way, will determine how well you cope
afterwards.
It is quite normal to experience some 'baby blues' about the time
that your milk comes in -> around day three. But if the feelings
of depression don't become lighter over the next day, or so, then
speak to your midwife about how you may not be coping with the emotional
issues that surround the birth of your child.
You may find some relief by talking of your feelings to your partner,
family, friends, the midwives and the doctors who were involved
in your care. By reliving the event, in this way, you may desensitise
yourself to some of the stronger emotions attached to your memories.
If you were planning a natural birth, then it is normal to experience
some grief at the loss of such an integral life experience. We envision
how our children's births will unfold on the day, and when things
don't go as planned we can feel grief at the loss of an important
life experience.
'In the future, I will be asking the hospital
if there is a counsellor on staff that I can talk to. After the
birth I was shell-shocked and I was not thinking straight. I really
needed someone to explain what had happened and listen to me. My
obstetrician visited me but it was all so brief and there was the
baby to think of. I was just focussing on his well-being. I needed
someone to ask about me -> not the stitches or the pain but my mental
well being.'
These feelings may not arise immediately following the birth of
our child. We may be too busy being grateful for the safe arrival
of our little one, and thanking the technology that enabled us to
be holding a healthy, beautiful child in our arms. It may be a few
weeks further on that we become aware of a feeling of loss.
Women may discover they feel happy to have a healthy child, but
they still feel distress at the way their child was born. They can
acknowledge the positive outcome, but they have problems accepting
the way in which this same outcome (of a healthy child) was achieved.
Family and friends may not understand why the Mother feels this
way. They may encourage her to focus on the healthy baby, and forget
about the issues she has with the caesarean birth of her child.
Or they may disregard her yearnings to have experienced a natural
birth for her child, pointing out the positives of caesarean birth
(organising day, no pain during labour, etc).
Speaking to a counsellor about the past experience may help, as
will contacting an organization such as Birthrites, which is made
up of women who have experienced caesarean birth and felt as you
do, and can therefore empathise with and understand your emotional
state.
Birthrites organises get-togethers, where you can speak to like-minded
women and gain knowledge about how others have coped with their
own experiences of caesarean birth. Contact details are listed on
the back page of this booklet.
To find out how to obtain a free copy, or how you
can organise to distribute the booklets, please click
here.
