'I Just Popped Out' - Ceridwen's Birth.
Our four year old daughter made the comment, 'I just popped out.'
when she was telling her older brother about her birth.
As she was my fifth child, I agree she did sort of pop out. It was
a quick labour. Here is the story of Ceridwen's birth that took place
on the 22nd March 1996, in the home we were living in at Marden. I
was 39 at the time of Ceridwen's birth. My partner, Ben, and I knew
the safest and most comfortable place for me to birth was at home
with our family around us.
Our birth attendants were many. Ben, who is a wonderful man and
a central person in my life with our children. Our midwife Julie,
whom we have all grown to love and respect for her wealth of knowledge
and reassuring manner. Aaron is Ceridwen's eldest brother, who was
16 at the time and video-taped the birth. Our oldest daughter, Dani
(then 13), whose physical closeness when I birth is important to me.
Jacob who was 11 at the time of Ceri's birth; he told his teacher
two days before she was born, that he was not doing any more school
work until the baby was born. Teigue is our youngest son. He was two
when his little sister was born. He walked around eating his breakfast
toast while I laboured and birthed. Eugene a close friend and her
teenage son, Lawrence, came to offer their support. Deane another
close friend who had never been at a birth came to take photographs.
Rodney, who is also a friend and just happened to be staying with
Deane on holiday from interstate at the time, came to witness the
entry of our newest family member.
The pregnancy was not planned, although we did want another child,
our plan was to conceive at least a year later than we did. I was
not happy initially to be pregnant again when my youngest child was
only 15 months old. Once I stopped feeling sick, it was easier for
me to join in my partners happiness about our pregnancy.
I was nauseas for the first four months and at times threw up at
school, in the sinks outside of my classroom. My class of year 6s
and 7s were very understanding and accepted that I needed to eat in
class, to stop being sick, when they could not eat in class. They
were excited about my pregnancy, they took care of me. I worked until
the end of the year and then took leave when I was about 5 months
pregnant.
I think the worse time for me was driving home, especially when it
was hot. My car was not air-conditioned and although I did not have
to pull over often to throw up, it was most unpleasant when it did
happen. I remember coming home, and vomiting, then eating dinner,
and sleeping on the couch straight after eating, because I did not
vomit when I was asleep. It was amusing, though, when our little son,
Teigue, walked around the house making retching noises just like me.
A disappointing aspect of this pregnancy was that I had to stop
breastfeeding Tiegue much sooner than I had planned. I had breastfed
all of my children for as long as possible, the longest being almost
four years. (I thought it was probably desirable to stop breastfeeding
Jacob before he started kindy.) I could not handle the pain associated
with feeding Teigue once I had conceived Ceridwen, my nipples were
so sensitive and sore when ever he suckled, so the weaning was rather
abrupt for both of us. Teigue's rejection of me as a consequence and
my sense of loss did not make the early part of the pregnancy any
easier for me to deal with. Teigue even at 15 months of age was showing
his gentle and loving nature and I did not like having to physically
disconnect myself from him so soon. I really think I was quite unhappy
about being pregnant for the first four months. I was not that I did
not want the baby I was carrying, but the interruption to my relationship
with Teigue and that the conception was earlier than we had planned.
Once the nausea stopped and I took leave from my job and was able
to re-establish my close relationship with Teigue, I felt better about
the pregnancy. By this time I was feeling daily movement from Ceridwen,
which I always find reassuring when I am pregnant. This was to be
our second homebirth, and Julie was our midwife for both. We had come
to know each other quite well and my family was comfortable with her
as was I. The pregnancy progressed well, I was quite a large woman
by the end of the pregnancy. I was having difficulty walking the five
minute walk to the shops at the end of the road in twenty minutes.
I could only wear one pair of shoes, they were health sandals. The
braxton hicks contractions were quite strong for the last four weeks
of the pregnancy. I knew they were doing their job preparing my uterus
and cervix for birthing.
I had begun to write the proposal for my Master of Education thesis
in the early stages of my pregnancy and knew I had to complete the
proposal before I birthed this new babe. On Thursday the 21st March,
during the day I visited my auntie who had birthed 5 children herself.
I remember her telling me the baby would be born soon. That evening
I completed my thesis proposal at about 11.00pm and got it ready to
deliver to my supervisor.
My husband, who was used to me sitting studying into the small hours,
had gone to sleep. I was restless, but also satisfied that I had done
everything I needed to in order to be ready to have this baby. I read
for a while, drank raspberry leaf tea, as I had been doing for the
past few weeks and then went to sleep.
I awoke at about 5.00am and got up to wee and as I stood up from
our futon bed I felt a gush of wet between my legs. I thought my bladder
control had finally given in and went to have a wee, collecting clean
undies on the way. When I got up from the loo, I felt another wet
gush and knew that as I had just emptied my bladder, my waters had
broken. I put on the clean undies and a pad. I had been loosing the
mucous plug from my cervix for the past couple of days. I had come
away in small amounts. I wandered around the house putting things
in order, deciding what to do next. I felt very relaxed and in control.
I felt I could trust my body to do what it was meant to do and I knew
I would be holding my baby in my arms shortly.
I had a shower and washed my hair, and put on loose garments to
birth in. I woke Ben and told him we would be birthing soon. I spoke
with Julie, at just after 6.00am and told her my waters had broken,
I was not in labour and my cervix was still tipped back. She knew
I was likely to go into labour soon , so she came over. I rang my
support team. Eugenie and Lawrence came over without even a cup of
coffee, Ben had plenty on the brew by the time they arrived. I rang
Aaron and after a couple of phone discussions (he has always been
hard to wake up) he was awake enough to walk the couple of kilometres
from his flat to our home. I rang Deane (his partner was already at
work and would pop in at morning tea time to see how we were going)
and told them I was not in labour but it was imminent, Deane and Rodney
decided to have breakfast before they came over. While we were waiting
for everyone to arrive I woke Jacob and Dani to let them know what
was happening, I cannot remember when Tiegue woke up. I got our birthing
gear from the bedroom and put it lounge.
Everyone, except Deane and Rodney arrived between 6.30am and 7.00am.
Being early in the morning, some people napped on our lounge chairs,
others consumed breakfast of toast, tea and coffee. I don't think
I felt like food. After talking with me, getting her birthing kit
ready, and greeting the rest of our birthing team, Julie napped on
the couch. I phoned Deane and Rodney at about 7.30am and asked them
to hurry. I was still not in labour, but Julie and I both knew it
would not be long before I was. I walked around the lounge, the kitchen
and outside. It was a beautiful, crisp sunny morning and promised
to be a pleasant day.
Dani, Jacob and Lawrence were playing cards on the floor where I
planned to birth. They were all expecting the birth to be a couple
of hours away, when I asked them to pack up the game because I would
need the space soon. As I was still not in labour, but continuing
to have gentle braxton hicks contractions they did not believe me.
I had to be very firm with them to get them to move. Dani must have
known I was serious because she did not leave my side from when the
cards were packed up until her little sister was born. It was now
just before 8.30am, I was surrounded by people who loved me. They
were talking, laughing, and waiting. I felt secure and quietly excited.
Dani was at my side and I think we had been timing contractions, but
I am not sure about this. Ben and Eugenie got the birthing linen ready
on the floor in front of the couch, by the heater where we planned
to birth. I am not sure who was looking after Teigue but I think everyone
was. On the video, Teigue was wandering around playing and chatting
with people, as two year olds do, and eating toast for breakfast.
From one contraction to the next, the feel of the gentle contractions
changed, and I knew I was in labour. I could feel the build up to
the first real labour contraction and asked Dani to wake Julie as
soon as the contraction had finished. We did not need to wake Julie,
because the tone of my voice during the contraction awoke her, she
was quite in tune with what was going on, even though she appeared
to be napping.
Julie opened her eyes as the contraction ended and said something
like, this is for real isn't is. I agreed and Julie was ready. It
was 8.30am. I know I did not have many contractions before my labour
was in second stage. I do remember between these early contractions
needing to wee and knowing I could not get to the loo and back without
having another contraction. I asked Dani, to accompany me to the toilet,
Ben was busy with Teigue, and although Dani was not impressed with
the idea of going to the loo to help her labouring mum, she went with
me. I did have a contraction as we were on our way back to the birthing
place.
Once we were back in the lounge Ben and Eugenie were ready to support
my weight as my uterus contracted. I laboured most of the first stage
on all fours. Aaron had the video under control. Jacob, Lawrence and
Dani kept an eye on Teigue. Julie and Ben were in front of me, I always
need to see my partner when I am in labour. There was only one time
when Teigue's presence made me feel uncomfortable, and this was when
he crawled under my swollen belly, while I was having a contraction,
and tried to touch my belly. Ben quickly removed him from under me
and passed him back to Dani. Just before I went from first stage of
labour to second, Deane and Rodney arrived. I was pleased they had
arrived and was even able to greet them briefly. This was good timing
as Deane had a camera and was going to take photos of the birth.
I don't remember the transition clearly but I do know I needed to
get my undies off and as I was having trouble moving my bulking body
around, Eugenie wanted to cut my undies off. We did not need to cut
them off, as Ben and I managed to remove them. I then reclined onto
Eugenie's legs in a squatting position, with her sitting on the couch,
and my arms draped over her legs as she supported my weight while
I pushed Ceridwen out. I was in the place of birthing time that is
totally disconnected from real time and although I knew I had not
been in labour for long, I was unaware of how short a time I had been
birthing. I do know the contractions were long and very powerful,
I did not have much rest between contractions. When the time to push
came, Ceridwen come out in one powerful contraction. Julie was talking
me through the contraction, she told me the head was birthing, then
the baby was out. Ceridwen gently slipped out into the waiting hands
of Ben as Julie supported my perineum. It was a mighty contraction
that felt like it was never going to end, but at the end of it we
had our baby on our side of my belly and now we could all share her.
Ben and Julie lifted her onto my chest and I held her close. The
look on my face on the video shows my surprise at the speed of her
birth. It was 9.00am only a half an hour after my labour had begun.
I held our new little bundle and checked her out. She was perfect
in everyway and was the pinkest new born I had ever seen. Julie gave
her an APGAR of 10 at birth. In between cries, Ceridwen started to
become familiar with my breasts as we all looked on in awe at the
beautiful little person who was already a very much loved member of
our family.
I cuddled our new little daughter for a short time while the cord
continued to pulse and Jacob sat beside me, waiting for his first
cuddle. Ben cut the cord and Jacob had his first cuddle. Then Ceri
was passed around for all to hold and admire. I squatted over a bowl
to deliver the placenta, which came away with a couple of contractions.
Julie showed us all the marvel of the placenta, which we stored in
the fridge for planting an apple tree on later.
There was a lot a cleaning up of breakfast things, playing with Teigue,
making of tea and coffee happening around us. Ben and Julie helped
Ceridwen and I up the stairs to the bath, where Ben and I had some
private time with our newest child. After the bath, Ceridwen, Ben
and I went to our bed and rested for a short time. Julie, and I guess
others cleaned up the birthing linen and our house was quieter. Deane's
partner who had been phoned just after Ceri was born, dropped in for
morning tea, and being a chiropractor, checked Ceri's spine during
a cuddle, before returning to work.
Eugenie and Lawrence went home to sleep. Deane and Rodney also left
us. Our older children found quiet things to do for a few hours and
we all rested. I remember Julie sitting on the end of our bed hugging
my feet and telling me what a good job I had done. When she was happy
we were content and all was well, she too went home, I hope to rest.
What a wonderful experience we had shared, our family was closer
as a result of this birth. My children had a positive view of the
birthing process with the support of a highly skilled midwife, whom
we all knew well and trusted.
Yes, Ceridwen was right in a way, she did just pop out. Out of my
womb and into a loving family, every member most special.
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