Birth Of Mitchell Ivan.
13/3/98 - 37 Weeks pregnant, and The obstetrician, armed
with a scan showing 'slightly below average' amniotic volume, and
an inconclusive non-stress test, set a date for an inducement in a
weeks time. " Your baby is doing 68km/hr, and we like them to do 70km/hr"
was his comment.
19/3/98 - 39 weeks pregnant and settled uncomfortably
into hospital ready for inducement in the morning. I was given one
lot of prostaglandin gels at midnight that night. I didn't sleep at
all.
20/3/98 - 1 started having niggles from about 6a.m.,
so I paced around the room a bit petrified & excited about becoming
a mother today ! l was taken to the labor ward at 8a.m. for another
lot of gel. A painful internal exam revealed a tightly closed cervix.
(Even though my G.P. had proclaimed me to have a 'favourable cervix'
one-week prior). We were left alone most of the time with me flat
on my back with a monitor on. I was told I couldn't have a drip or
my waters broken, as I hadn't started to dilate at all. The niggles
seemed painful, and I was scared, so I asked for (and got) an epidural.
- (After the midwife told me I must have the lowest pain threshold
she'd ever seen.). Another internal at midday showed still no dilation,
and the obstetrician announced that "if we waited for a natural delivery
we'd be here all weekend. .. Bikini-line c/section at 4p.m. See you
then. . . " That was it, out he walked. My G.P. filled me in on all
the details, ordered me a top-up on the epidural for 3.30p.m.,and
off I trundled to theatre. Mitchell was born not long before 5p.m.
He was 7lb.2OZ., Apgars of 9, with a weak suck, and looking slightly
shocked at the rudeness of his eviction.
The first few months were awful, with an unsettled
colicky baby who fed every hour day and night. I felt anxious, incompetent
and a certain dread when I heard him wake each time. Eventually I
recognized that my feelings were not normal, and that this depression
& disappointment in myself & the birth were real and needed to be
dealt with. So I contacted Birthrites via BACUP, and thus begun my
journey of healing.
The Birth of Riley Max.
In the 2 1/2 years since I'd had Mitchell I'd learnt
a lot about birth & VBACs (mainly thanks to Birthrites & books etc
accessed through them). So I was very keen to have a beautiful intervention
free birth. I went to Natural Birth Classes and Spiritual Workshops,
and enrolled in the Fremantle Community Midwifery Scheme so as to
have a Midwife as my primary carer. Lesley agreed to take me on as
her client as she was very comfortable and experienced in VBAC births,
(even though I was completely out of her area and she had to travel
for miles to get to me each visit. - thank you Lesley !). It was just
so great to feel relaxed and comfortable talking about my pregnancy
& birth plans without pressure. A slight spanner in the works at 26
weeks when I went for my compulsory obstetrician's visit. He started
demanding constant monitoring, i.v. bungs, and a threat of a c/section
if the baby appeared big near term. I left the clinic feeling sick
to my stomach and shaking so much that I accidentally drove into the
pergola of the clinic as I was reversing out! Lesley calmed me down
and we discussed compromises together. We agreed to compromise on
the I.V. bung, and a 20-minute monitoring strip on arrival to the
hospital. I wasn't keen on having the obstetrician near me during
labor, but once again Lesley reassured me that he wouldn't even be
called in unless anything went wrong - Just my great G.P. (Ian). Lesley,
my husband Doug, and my Mum would be around. I avoided going back
to my38 week visit to the obstetrician, as a 36-week scan showed a
baby already about 4kg! Lesley repeatedly told me that scans aren't
always accurate, and that size of the baby isn't always a drama So
I relaxed a bit, but still couldn't quite force myself to make it
to that visit in case he scheduled me in for a c/section !
My due-date came and went, as did my sister's wedding
and the houseful of guests that we hosted for a fortnight or so. It
was a hectic time, but I felt pretty calm and confident. The night
after everyone but mum went home I started to have contractions. They
lasted most of the night and early morning, just to tail off again.
I was disappointed. The next morning the same thing happened, this
time I was sure it was for real. I rang Lesley to come over, but by
the time she got there all was quiet. I felt pretty deflated now.
Every now and then I would get a weak contraction during the day.
I went to bed at 9p.m. and at 9.30 I suddenly had a strong contraction.
My first reaction was "NO, not now, I'm too tired, just go away 'til
morning". 5 minutes later another even harder contraction, there was
no turning back now. At 10 p.m. Doug came home to find me leaning
over a cupboard with my head in a pillow groaning about how I couldn't
handle the pain and I had changed my mind about a natural birth, He
promptly rang Lesley, and by the time she got there I'd got my head
around it and was pacing the lounge-room floor and contracting strongly
every 5 minutes or so. As soon as Lesley arrived my contractions tailed
off to 6,9, then 15 minutes apart. I couldn't believe it, surely I
wasn't going to stop again... Half an hour later we were back into
2-3 minutely strong contractions. I had my Mum and husband fetching
Gatorade, giving backrubs and playing my favourite music. I felt pretty
good, and in control - this seemed right... 6 hours went fast. Then
Lesley asked if I wanted an internal to see how I was going, which
I was pretty keen for. I was 4cm. Dilated at 4a.m.- which I was ecstatic
about (remember I hadn't even dilated one bit with Mitchell's birth).
Lesley also quietly said that he was posterior with bulging membranes
and a very high head. She asked if I wanted to take the trek into
hospital now and have the membranes broken in case this was holding
the head back.
As I was planning a hospital birth anyway I decided
to go in. The car trip wasn't as bad as I had envisioned, although
I had never noticed so many potholes and bumps in the road before.
Once established at the hospital the next few hours were a blur. -
I only really remember Lesley's quiet voice talking me through the
contractions, and me thinking 'Oh God, not another one" with the onset
of each contraction.
Ian broke my waters at 5.30a.m., and another internal
revealed 5-6cm and the head still very high. Ian seemed concerned
about bub's head being so high, and suggested I opt for an epidural,
as it might be hard to find an anesthetist later on. I declined, as
I felt pretty excited to be 5-6cm. (Although Lesley said afterwards
that she suspected that was an overestimation). I changed my mind
an hour or so later as the contractions became increasingly fierce.
We discussed my options, and both Ian & Lesley thought that an epidural
might relax me enough to allow the head to descend. Yes it was hard
to find an anesthetist by then, I had to wait until 8a.m. or after,
and by then I was pretty ready for some pain relief. I remember telling
Mum that "people who say they enjoyed their labors are all liars",
I had however surprised myself at coping so well for so long without
any pain-relief. The epidural took 3 attempts, and lots of painful
contractions while trying to keep still, - finally it was in. The
obstetrician was called in, and was pretty stroppy at me for not coming
back for my 3 8-week appointment. I was pretty devastated to hear
that at the time, especially as he pronounced me 4c.m. Dilated and
head at 4 station. He suggested that I be given 2 hours for the head
to descend and to be fully dilated. I cried, Doug cried, Mum cried.
It seemed a cruel twist of fate. Apparently Ian also got a dressing
down for not informing the obstetrician about the apparent size of
the baby. Anyway then we put the monitor on to see how bub was faring
through all of this, and straight away his heartrate dipped down to
60-70b/min. It stayed this low for 2-3 minutes - which scared the
shit out of me. I was petrified that something was going to go desperately
wrong even though Lesley assured me it was only because of the flat
position I was in for the monitoring. I knew intellectually about
positioning and babies heartrates, but 1 couldn't get the panic out
of my mind, and I started to shake, feel freezing cold and my blood
pressure began to rise I requested that the obstetrician come back
early and check me, then get on with the c/section. He did come back
a bit early and after another internal found I still hadn't made any
progress. He was much nicer when he returned - I think he'd had a
rethink about his attitude, or maybe someone had had a word to him.
The c/section went really well. I had Doug with me, Lesley and lan
also assisted, and before long our gorgeous boy was being handed over
to me straight from the birth with only a towel on him to stop him
slipping away. He was able to hold his head up so strongly we were
amazed. Doug and I had tears pouring down our faces as we gazed at
our beautiful Riley. Doug got to cut the cord - he said it was tough
like rubber ! Afterwards in recovery Mum was waiting, and gave us
a cuddle and Doug & her took Riley to the nursery to be weighed and
measured. We weren't really surprised to find out he was 91b l20z
(4.450kg.), with a 37 1/2 cm head, and 54cm long. He had Apgar scores
of 9, and was perfect!
In the days that followed I did shed a few tears over
my lost dream of having a natural birth. It helped that I had a lot
of heart-felt talks to Lesley to get things straight in my mind. I
still feel sad that I couldn't give Riley the gift of a perfect start
to life, but I feel that during my labor I was in control, and did
all that I could do to achieve my dream. Riley chose his own birthday
and was born strong, healthy and was (& still is) a very placid &
settled baby. I feel proud of my birthing experience and this has
given me a sense of healing over Mitchell's birth. Overall an empowering
experience with a beautiful outcome...
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