I really wanted to have a vaginal birth after my first baby (Kayla
- 9 pound 9 oz.)was delivered via caesarean. My body just wouldn't
go into labour no matter what we did and at 42 weeks with high blood
pressure there didn't seem to be any other option
.I didn't realise at the time how much of a failure i would feel
afterwards, so being able to give birth to my second child was really
important for the way that i viewed myself as a woman. Because of
my previous experience and all the negative feedback from some of
the doctors I still couldn't imagine that my body would know how
to go into labour on it's own. But I was wrong.
After being told at my antenatal appointment on Tuesday (40 + weeks)
that i was 2cms dilated and he had stretched me to 3cms I was over
the moon. I waited anxiously all night but nothing happened (besides
the usual Braxton Hicks I had been having for weeks). So I got up
on Wednesday morning and started to get my 6 yr old ready for school
when I felt a bit wet. I rang my husband and said that my waters
might have broken but i wasn't sure, I took another step and said
ok they are definately broken you'd better get your butt home now
(he worked an hour away and still had to pick up a babysitter on
the way).
I was a bit scared because i was having contractions every five
minutes but they were very mild so i had a shower and they backed
off to being 10 minutes apart. We didn't end up getting to the hospital
until nearly 3 hours later but nothing much was happening anyway.
I was monitored for a few hours and then they said i had to get
the dreaded canula in my hand (one of my biggest fears about going
to the hospital), it didn't end up being as bad as ones i've had
in the past though once it was in right. We waited and waited but
mum and hubby ended up going home at about 9pm leaving me in the
antenatal ward, which is when things finally decided to start getting
serious.
Every second contraction seemed to be quite painful so I kept getting
off the hospital bed and leaning on the end of it trying to breath
through them. At about 10.30pm I went down to the nurses station
and broke into tears. She felt one of the mild contractions and
suggested I have a hot shower and a panadeine and try and get some
sleep - that is until a strong contraction came along and she went
ok change of plans you're going straight down to the labour ward.
By 11pm when i arrived in the labour ward I was doubled over the
sink in the toilets trying desperately to relax through a contraction
but it was just to painful. I was taken to a room and hooked up
to the monitor where i continued to writhe around on the bed trying
to escape the pain but it was no use. I eventually gave in at about
2am to a shot of morphine, which I think was more painful than the
contactions and the only time i swore through the whole labour.
I still didn't have any relief and it wasn't until 3am that i
asked them to call my husband. Disappointingly I was still only
3cms so I told mum to wait a bit longer until she came in. I got
moved to a labour room at 3.30am so i had a shower and the midwife
agreed to let me labour standing next to the bed for a while. I
was leaning on a bean bag and inhaling the gas, but i couldn't stop
myself from screaming through the peak of the contraction so i kept
ending up biting down on the inhaler instead of breathing through
it. Finally the midwife called the anaesthetist in and he inserted
the epidural - What a relief!
I went from complete and utter agony to total bliss in a matter
of minutes. We called mum in at 5.30am but I still had a long way
to go and was only about 8cms by 8am. I couldn't stop shivering
and I ended up with a temperature, it turned out that the drip wasn't
in my hand properly so I hadn't been getting any fluids.
The midwife called a doctor in as she thought that the babies heart
rate was a bit erratic, so they ended up taking some blood from
her head to check that she was getting enough oxygen. All was well
so we waited until the new doctor came on at 10am to see if I was
fully dilated. My heart sunk when I saw the doctor who had been
pushing for the elective caesar at my antenatal appointments. He
started talking about me having labored for too long already and
i probably wouldn't be fully dilated so I would probably have to
have a caesarean. I was speechless and devastated because I had
come so far.
Thankfully he was wrong though. He examined me and I was fully
dilated and he said I could start pushing when I was ready. We had
to turn the epidural off so I could feel how to push and I was petrified
of the pains coming back. After 2 hours of pushing, the babies head
had come down but the shoulders wouldn't. The doctor had to come
in and use vacuum extraction to get her out.
All of a sudden the room was filled with midwives and doctors and
they all seemed to be pushing along with me while the doctor prepared
me for the procedure. I felt a sting and then we heard a loud snip
as he did an episiotomy and got the vacuum going. I have never pushed
so hard in my life, the vacuum flew off when Toris head was half
out and I thought my body would split in two. The feeling of pressure
was unbelievable and i wanted to scream get her out but I couldn't
even speak.
I managed one last enormous push and Toris body slid out of me,
I felt overcome with relief. They put her straight on my stomach
which I was so grateful for. She was a little bit slow to get breathing
but then everything was perfect. We did it. She weighed 8 pound
9 oz. 53cms long and 35cm head, so she was smaller than my first.
I felt so well afterwards, compared to the caesarean. Giving birth
to Tori was the most powerful and healing experience of my life.